Last week we aksed specifically for prayer that Ian would be encouraged. We’ve noticed over the last few days that he seems to be more like himself and more encouraged. In what specific ways the Lord has encouraged him, we may never know. But he has been communicating with us more regularly and several times he’s given me a long blink when I asked him if he had a good day.
God really met Ian and I last night, just before each of us called it a night. I was praying with Ian that God would allow him to use his voice. I could tell by the way his breathing changed that he was really trying to speak and he used his blinks to tell me that he was trying too. We kept praying and eventually I heard his voice- a few times. How kind of God to give us that one small glimpse of his ability to strengthen Ian and His power to work in his body.
“that their hearts may be encouraged, being knit together in love, to reach all the riches of full assurance of understanding and the knowledge of God’s mystery, which is Christ, in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge.”
Col 2:2-4
Thank you for praying for Ian. We keep praying that he comes back to us fully restored.
Psalms 30:1 says, “I will exalt you, O LORD, for you lifted me out of the depths and did not let my enemies gloat over me.” The part “you lifted me out of the depths” brought up a metephor of how we used to be before being saved: We were in the ocean and we were diving straight down into the dark depths, away from God. We were swimming in a sea of sin and rebellion but then God chose to save us. He reached His great hand down and yanked us up and out into the oxygen. As we broke the surface we gasped for breath and and we were relieved. I am so thankful that God has saved me from this and so should we all. I am so glad that we are saved from eternal extreme harm, especially since Ian is in the condition he’s in. If I were not saved I would be confused, abandoned and probably depressed. If I were not saved Ian’s car crash would be a total tragedy, but because I know God is behind it all I have faith in Him. God has given me that faith and that’s the only way I’m going to make it through this situation. Confusion is silenced by God’s shown sovereignty, abondonedness is deserted because of God’s Spirit that fills us with comfort, and depression should not be around if these things are true. Be thankful that you’re saved. God’s saving power not only saves us from hell, but also from discomfort in anyway if we ask for it – and even sometimes when we don’t ask for it.
Pray for healing, but also pray that God would comfort my parents, Larissa, and especially Ian.
“Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths. Be not wise in your own eyes; fear the LORD, and turn away from evil.” Proverbs 3:5-7
Ian sang this verse on one of the Hide the Word cds, and I was listening to it a couple days ago. The verse, the tune and Ian’s voice have stayed with me since then. Ian, through God’s Word sung, was instructing me about his situation. I can’t lean on my own understanding, trying to figure out why this happened or trying to figure out how to get him back. If I did that I might be tempted to lose hope. But, God is faithful, and my responsibility is to trust in Him with all my heart. So, we take the next step – whatever that is – trusting that the Lord is leading us and doing what’s right for his own glory and for Ian’s good.
Ian left me speechless today. I had heard from others (and probably even reported) that Ian would shake his head to tell us ‘no’, but I had never seen him do it. I asked him tonight if he wanted a pillow behind his head, and he very clearly shook his head ‘no’. It was so obvious and so took me by surprise I think I moved away from him suddenly for just a moment.
Thank you for your faithful prayers. Pray that he would talk to us with his voice.
The other day, Ian’s friend David was telling him about the first week in the hospital after the accident. David was recalling how close Ian was to death, how much we were praying for him, and how God saved him from passing away. He was reminding Ian of the good parts of those first few days, like all the love we were shown from our friends, and the difficult times, like how worried we were about him. As David was telling him this, Ian reached up from his bed and put his hand on David’s shoulder.
Knowing Ian (and the God who cares for him), I can be certain that Ian is thankful for all that God has done for and through him. Although this situation must be hardest for Ian, I can tell he appreciates the love everyone has been showing him. If Ian were able to speak, I’m sure he would thank you more enthusiatically than anyone else would.
“Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice insofar as you share Christ’s sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed.” 1 Peter 4:12-13
On my way home from work today, I got stuck in a huge thunderstorm. It was one of those storms that left huge puddles in the road and my car kept getting pulled into the puddles. I was pretty nervous driving through the storm- my wipers were going as fast as they could and it still wasn’t keeping my windshield clear.
But all of a sudden it was like I passed through a door into blue skies. It was such a relief. I don’t think that I’d realized how much I wanted to be out of that storm until I actually was out of it. I was driving away from the storm too, so for the rest of my drive home I could see the dark clouds from my rearview mirror and only clear skies in front of me.
That simple thunderstorm made me think of this trial. During this “storm” I’m tempted to fear, or to become anxious, and just want to be out of it. But just as God safely lead me out of the thunderstorm, He will safely lead us out of this trial. And when this trial is over, I will feel like we can let out our breath for the first time since Sept. 30. While we are guaranteed to have more times of adversity there will also be more times of prosperity and plenty of times away from the storms that we face now. And even if we don’t see the end of this trial in this world, meeting Jesus’ will be that much sweeter.
Ian sat in a “normal” chair tonight- a wing back chair that we’ve had in his room. He did really well. It was his first time in nine months not sitting or laying in something weird like a wheelchair or a hospital bed. He wasn’t supported by any straps and he was able to put his feet on the ground. That must’ve felt so good for him.
We noticed however that Ian seemed to be having a challenging day. He gave me two long, deliberate blinks tonight when I asked him if he was discouraged. We don’t know what he’s discouraged about or if he definitely is discouraged. His therapists tonight suggested that as he becomes more awake, he will become more aware of his current disabilities- what a challenging thought that is. I don’t know what all he is able to process and understand or how aware he is of his condition. But he knows who we are, he knows how to hold our hands, he knows how to swallow food- he must be aware that his body is not doing what it used to do. I can’t imagine not being able to do the simplest things for nine months. I think about how limited he is physically and I can understand why he might feel discouraged. What makes this more challenging is that it is not Ian’s character at all to be heavily discouraged by anything. I remember asking him if he wanted to be healed and he said “yes”- he knows that he needs God to heal him.
Only the Lord can encourage Ian. And we are blessed in that Ian is an object of God’s love and mercy, not His wrath. We do not know his specific struggles or needs. And even if we did, we could not satisfy those needs. But the Lord does. This all is for the Lord’s glory and this, this little trial that we face in our thoughts tonight is working for us a greater good and is sanctifying Ian. For Ian to have one glimpse of the Lord’s face tonight would would bless him in a way that none of us could fathom.
Please join us in praying that Ian would deeply experience the Lord’s presence and encouragement tonight. Ian lies tonight in his bed at the foot of the cross, at the mercy of our Lord, in the hands of our savior.
The other day I was singing some hymns and playing guitar next to Ian’s chair. While I was singing the hymn In Chirst Alone, Ian slowly lifted his arm in the air; it was strikingly clear he was worshiping God. In our church, raising your hands is a common expression of praise to God, something Ian did frequently prior to the accident. Even though he couldn’t sing along, I could tell he was joining with me in worship to God.
Let this encourage us that God has not forgotten Ian! God has given Ian a reason to worship him.
-Ben
In Christ alone my hope is found; He is my light, my strength, my song; This cornerstone, this solid ground, Firm through the fiercest drought and storm. What heights of love, what depths of peace, When fears are stilled, when strivings cease! My comforter, my all in all— Here in the love of Christ I stand.
In Christ alone, Who took on flesh, Fullness of God in helpless babe! This gift of love and righteousness, Scorned by the ones He came to save. Till on that cross as Jesus died, The wrath of God was satisfied; For ev’ry sin on Him was laid— Here in the death of Christ I live.
There in the ground His body lay, Light of the world by darkness slain; Then bursting forth in glorious day, Up from the grave He rose again! And as He stands in victory, Sin’s curse has lost its grip on me; For I am His and He is mine— Bought with the precious blood of Christ.
No guilt in life, no fear in death— This is the pow’r of Christ in me; From life’s first cry to final breath, Jesus commands my destiny. No pow’r of hell, no scheme of man, Can ever pluck me from His hand; Till He returns or calls me home— Here in the pow’r of Christ I’ll stand.
Those of us who know Ian know that he can sing well, and he has sung on Mark’s scripture song series called, Hide the Word. I was listening to this Scripture put to song (2 Cor 4:17-18): “For this slight momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.” Ian sang that song. I hope today that he remembers that Scripture and is being comforted by it. This “slight momentary affliction” he’s experiencing is preparing something incredible for the future.
He was eating pudding tonight. He was cleared to start eating things with the consistency of honey or liquids thickened to that consistency, so tonight he got pudding. There’s a delay before he swallows, but we’ve been told that the delay is to be expected. It’s fairly typical for someone in his condition. Improvement for him will include a quicker response time in his swallowing, but he’s improved to this point already where he’s actually swallowing. He wasn’t even doing that before.
Someone asked about his “rating” on the coma scale. Just to be clear, he is still in a coma. The scales are used just for discussion and provide a framework for treatment, but giving him another rating on the scale isn’t like graduating him from first grade to second grade. There just isn’t a clear break like that, and it’s a matter of opinion as to where he falls on the scale. And, at this point, we’re less concerned about his place on the scale and more concerned with evidence of progress. That’s why we talk less now about his place on the scale.
Today was a busy but good day for Ian. He was able to go to Youth Camp tonight, a camp put on by our church that Ian has gone to since he was 12. He was pretty responsive at certain times throughout the night. It just seems right to take him places like we did tonight where he hears worship and messages. It’s sure to be encouraging for him and honoring to God. He communicated to me tonight just before he fell asleep that he was glad he went and it was all very familiar to him.
God continues to answer our prayers. We have been praying that Ian would respond to his therapists so that we would get more therapy visits, and he did exactly that yesterday when he held my hand.
Val L- You get a special shout-out tonight. Ian had a modified barium swallow done today and he did really well. He swallowed when he was supposed to and everything. They said he could start having thickened liquids orally so today he had some coffee. I can’t wait to hear from Ian what his memories of his sessions with you are….I’m thinking they’ll be pretty hilarious:) we miss you tons Val!
“When we reach heaven, there will be no sanctifying us there, no squaring us with affliction, no planing us with suffering. No, we must be made ready here—all that Christ will do he will do now; and when he has done it, we shall be ferried by a loving hand across the stream of death, and brought to the heavenly Jerusalem, to abide as eternal pillars in the temple of our Lord.”
Psalm 84:5 struck me today: “Blessed are those whose strength is in you, in whose heart are the highways to Zion.” As we face another day with Ian in a coma, I need to remember where my strength for the next moment comes from. There should be a highway in my heart that sends trust and praise to God and recognizes and receives care and strength from God. Moment by moment, Lord, help me to trust you and praise you. Send continual strength from your throne.
Ian was with a therapist today who was trying to get him to give a high five. To the therapist’s disappointment, Ian wouldn’t do it. Later, as I recounted this story it occurred to me he wouldn’t have done that before wreck; it’s highly unlikely he would do it now. Larissa asked him, then, to hold her hand. Ian did that. She asked him to do it again. He did it again. The therapist chimed in and said that if he did it again that would be a sign of consistency (something everyone has been looking for from the beginning). Larissa asked him to hold her hand again. Again, he reached out his hand took hers. He’s slowly making progress.
He continues to have back pain. Please pray. It keeps him from doing things we think that he could do.
Last week we aksed specifically for prayer that Ian would be encouraged. We’ve noticed over the last few days that he seems to be more like himself and more encouraged. In what specific ways the Lord has encouraged him, we may never know. But he has been communicating with us more regularly and several times he’s given me a long blink when I asked him if he had a good day. 
