Norm Burns and Doug Brown were putting up the facia and gutters on the addition on Saturday. So many people have helped us, and so many businesses have given us materials. At some point, I’d like to publish a list of all the businesses that have helped us. I don’t think I could produce the long list of people who have helped us. It would be impossible to remember. I can’t tell you how grateful we are.

The electricity and the plumbing were started and nearly finished. The walls for the rooms are up. The soffit, facia, and gutters were started and nearly finished. Our house is chaos. I’m not complaining. 🙂 It’s the “new normal” in Larissa’s words.

Steve

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I was only with Ian for about an hour tonight and he seemed to be having another sluggish day. He was half awake, but wasn’t really focusing with his eyes and didn’t really seem aware that we were with him. But he looks so much like himself and it’s such a blessing to be with him and hold his hand.

I often wonder what we look like from the outside. The other day I saw a patient who appears to be in a condition similar to Ian. I saw some of her family with her and was overwhelmed with pity for them. And then I realized that I’m the same as them- I just can’t see it. Sometimes I think though that it may be sadder looking from the outside. It might be sadder for people who only know Ian as he is now. The man that I fell in love with is still very much alive to me. When I’m pushing him in his chair, when I’m watching him in therapy, when I’m reminding him why he’s in a hospital, I’m with the same person who asked me on our first date last November. I don’t always see the wheelchair- I see my boyfriend. Being able to see Ian like this is only possible through God’s grace. I know the weakness of my own heart, but “He is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.”

I don’t want to believe that the man that I love is gone or that Mary and Steve’s son as they know him to be is gone. I pray for faith to continue believing that he is with us now and will be until God fully restores him. And I’m praying for faith that if Ian doesn’t come back to us fully, our futures are still good and we will someday see him in heaven, completely healed. No matter what happens, Ian is a part of our lives. We will continue to love him through the love that God has given us.

“What joy above all joys to know that I am His everlasting and inalienable inheritance, given to Him by His father before the earth was formed! Everlasting love shall be the pillow on which I rest my head tonight.”
-Spurgeon

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…and the roof is on. It’s coming along thanks to so many kind and hard working volunteers and generous donors of materials. Soon the interior walls will be up and the doors hung. The plumbing and electricity are supposed to be started tomorrow.

Larissa returned tonight with the news that Ian had a sluggish day today. Those are hard days. We keep hoping for the good days when he’s awake and alert and doing something new to show us he’s in there. “Hope deferred makes the heart sick.” We look forward to the day when we can get him around his family all the time and in familiar surroundings.

Pray for a full recovery…

Steve

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“The unfolding of your words gives light;
it imparts understanding to the simple.” (Psalm 119:130)

Why do bad things happen to good people? Can God’s Word (the Bible) help us understand this?

I have to remind myself of this often:

First, I see from the bible that there are no good people:

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At the Children’s Institute, they have what they call a standing board. They put Ian on his stomach on this thing, and it tilts at different angles. The “top” part has a pad for his chin. The “bottom” part has a place for his feet. They strap him into it and tilt it so he’s “standing.” He does that for an hour a day now as part of his therapy.

The staff reported to Mary today that he was able to respond to their command to “kick” a ball. It’s more like a movement of his foot forward to tap a ball. He responded slowly the first time, but he was consistently responding to their command to kick the ball. “Purposeful” is the word they keep using to describe the responses their looking for from Ian. The kicking was definitely purposeful; that’s a good thing.

Tomorrow the framing starts on the addition….

Thank you for your support in prayer.

Steve

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This is the view now looking outside our dining room. Our whole dining room is covered in blue light. What you’re seeing is the cement floor for the addition covered by a tarp tent. There’s a giant heater blowing heat into our tent to dry the cement. The addition is coming along.

Larissa reported today that the wound on Ian’s back is finally gone! They’ve stopped treating it, but they’re still going to be careful of the site just to be safe.

Thanks for praying…

Steve

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I brought a home video to the hospital tonight for Ian to watch. The first thing on screen when I turned it on in his room was a banner that said “Happy 6th Birthday Ian.” It was bittersweet to watch- it was so cool to see him and all of his little friends who have now become such godly men and are still in his life- and let’s be honest, the early 90s hairstyles and clothes were fantastic. But it also reminded me that he could do more at six years old than he can do now. But fortunately we are blessed to serve a God who, if He wills it, can bring Ian back to us exactly how he was five months ago- as that man after God’s own heart. I’m praying that he’s back to himself by the time he turns 22.

So I’m watching videos and sitting beside Ian’s bed while he sleeps, but tonight my heart is here, with this little girl:

http://aliviarachelhaughery32005.blogspot.com

Please pray for baby Livi along with Ian…

Larissa

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“For this reason I bow my knees before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth is named, that according to the riches of his glory he may grant you to be strengthened with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith–that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.”Ephesians 3:14-19

The only time that Ian was really awake today was when I was reading this scripture to him and praying. I was lifting Ian and myself up to God, praying that he would give us just another glimpse of the beadth, length, height and depth of His love. God’s word is so good and will never return void. I am so thankful for the opportunity to remind Ian of God’s beautiful promises.

I desperately want to hear Ian tell me something, anything, of where he has been for the past four months. I want assurance that my boyfriend is able to feel the nearness of the Lord. I want to know that he is not lonely but can feel God with him at all times. But he can’t tell me, and this is just one more area where faith enters the picture. And as Ben said in such a great way, if Ian is conscious and is aware of things, then God is definitely with him, because He promises that He will never leave nor forsake us (Hebrews 13:5). And even if Ian is just sleeping and won’t even remember this time, God is still with him.

Keep praying that Ian comes back. I desperately want him back here with us.

Larissa

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The progress on the addition to our house is stalled, because the inspector, who was supposed to inspect this part of the building project, lost his mother on Thursday. We can’t proceed without his approval, so the work that was supposed to happen today and tomorrow was cancelled.

His loss stings me a bit. I don’t know him. I didn’t know his mother. It still stings, though.

I found myself complaining today about having to pursue guardianship for Ian’s affairs. I never wanted to be Ian’s legal guardian. I wanted him to be on his own now serving God, to be pursuing a career, to be married, and to be looking toward children of his own some day. I didn’t recognize my complaint at first. Who could blame me for complaining, right?

I had to remind myself, though, of how merciful God has been to me and to my family. We’ve been shown so much mercy. Instead of a certain future in hell, he gave me a sweet anticipation of heaven. On top of that, he provides me earthly blessings as companions for the journey reminding me regularly of what’s to come and increasing my anticipation. In view of all that, how can I complain about any difficulty?

That inspector’s loss stings, because it highlights the fact that I’d lost sight of mercy. And, as Larissa reminded me, we could have lost Ian as that man lost his mother. I can’t imagine what he’s going through, but I have a glimpse. Sir, I prayed for you tonight.

Pray for Ian….

Steve

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Ian’s speech therapist said she was floored by his response to her this morning. She has been working on getting him to blink once, twice, and close his eyes on command. Usually, he may do it once or twice and there is quite a delay. But she said this morning that he was doing it consistently for about 10 minutes straight. He is also swallowing more than before and doing it in a much more “functional way,” meaning he is more often closing his mouth and touching his tongue to the roof of his mouth, like the rest of us swallow.

His right eye still looks really good and he’s using it a lot more than before. His mouth looks like it’s starting that vicious cycle again of becoming sore. Please pray that his mouth would heal and he would have total comfort.

Ian has looked really great the past two days that I’ve been with him. It’s been really encouraging to see new movements, even if they’re small. But, I’m still ready for this affliction to be over. I’m ready for Ian to talk to me again. It’s a constant battle with my thoughts to trust that God’s timing is perfect. I feel like Ian is missing so much in everyone’s lives and I’m not sure if any of us remember what normal life feels like anymore. But today I was thinking of all the times in my life that I’ve been wrong and all the times that what I thought was right was completely backwards compared to what God had planned for me. I’m so grateful that I serve a God who is never wrong! I can picture what I wish my life were like right now, but obviously that’s not what is best for me or for Ian. This is normal life now, and this new normal that God has given us is completely perfect.

“..when you are dry, go to God, ask him to shed abroad His joy in your heart, and then your joy shall be full.”
-Spurgeon

Larissa

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